Thanksgiving

Over the past couple years, I've delved into many different topics on this website, from the nostalgia I feel in fall, all the way to the eventual collapse of modern society. This year I'd like to take some time to explore the art and idea of thankfulness, and to mention a few things that I'm thankful for myself. When we think of thankfulness, especially in the west, it's often with sheepish words and a diverted gaze; sometimes the act of saying what we appreciate exudes boastfulness in a way we're raised to avoid. Even today, on the holiday which connotes introspection, reflection, and thankfulness, we say our grace with glazed eyes. Behind those eyes may be unexpressed and untapped joy. Or they may hide dark thoughts and unknown struggles. Or, most simply, there could lie the eagerness to indulge in the feast before us. The latter raises no questions and shows the hold our animalistic instincts have on our behavior. The former case conveys delightful innocence or harmless ignorance, raising the meager question: is subconscious acknowledgement of a fact the same as the overt expression of it? The answer is no, but it's pretty close.

The middle case deserves some attention. The last couple years have been a roller coaster for almost everyone on the planet. As commercials have been quick to capitalize on, some people lost jobs, some people lost homes, and some people lost such that there was no more to lose, and unfortunately, no more to gain. I don't want to dwell on those morbid matters, but I do want to acknowledge that almost everyone has experienced some form of loss, be that physical or emotional, over the last two years. And even now, as the world tries to eek its way back to some semblance of normalcy, the darkness is not losing its grip.

Yet even in the midst of terrible darkness there are things to be thankful for. As the platitude states: every shadow needs a light to cast it, and one only needs to look for it. And herein lies the central question: how does one look for it? If the shadow is cast over our future, is it really as easy as turning around to the past and seeing the light? Surely we'd all have been whistling throughout this pandemic if that were true. But oftentimes, turning around from the present just yields more sorrow as we see the heights from which we have fallen.

Perhaps understanding the shadow will help us assail it. For example, is it really a shadow cast from our past to the future? Maybe our future is the hazy edges of the shadow, which in itself is a reflection of our troubled psyche. There's plenty of fear mongering to be done around this shadow, but I think it's safe to say that at its root, it is a direct barrier to our contentment, and as such needs to be treated as an everlasting threat. In order to combat it, we need solutions which not only work for us in the short term, like petting a cute puppy, but also work for us after this shadow has waned, and can prevent its return in another time of crisis.

I've had success using a few different techniques, some of which are an amalgamation of lessons learned from my family and friends. First, I journal my thoughts extensively. This provides an outlet for my negative emotions, and allows me to partially externalize them. It doesn't always make me feel better at first; in fact, many times it deepens whatever grief, sorrow, or hardship I'm going through temporarily, but in the long run it helps separate my emotions from myself, increasing mindfulness, which is also improved by my second technique: meditation. This method is something I began building in freshman year, and have carried through with me ever since. I started through an app called "Insight Timer", which has a course detailing every step of meditation, from controlling one's breath to focusing on the innermost thoughts. Even without the mounting scientific evidence that meditation improves wellbeing, I'd highly recommend it simply as a way to extricate oneself from the shadows cast by our day to day lives.

My last technique is something my mother has always badgered me to take more seriously, but which I didn't put much stock into until witnessing one of my good friend's evening ritual of saying grace before dinner. Once every one or two days, I take some time to journal seven to ten specific things I am thankful for at that time. This practice puts my life into perspective, allowing me to banish any lingering negative thoughts by reflecting on some positive aspects of my life. Turns out moms know a thing or two.

Finally, I'd like to take some time to list some things I'm thankful for this year. First and foremost, I've got a great family which has given me every blessing for which one could ask. I'm also very lucky to be in good health, with a full grip of my physical and mental faculties. This country is likewise something to be thankful for, as despite its faults, it's still an absolute blessing to be able to live in a place which is so free and full of opportunity. My writing is always a great boon for me, and while I haven't been posting much here lately, I've been hard at work on longer projects which have proved to be quite fulfilling, which I hope to share with you soon. Lastly, I am thankful for anyone who has read, or is reading, the little things I post on this website, and especially anyone who reaches out and tells me how it has affected them. I hope all the people reading this (and even those who are not), have a good Thanksgiving full of the three most important F-words: Family, Food, and Football.